


Flares

by justanoutlaw



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Love From OQ | Outlaw Queen Secret Admirer (Once Upon a Time), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:41:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29439159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanoutlaw/pseuds/justanoutlaw
Summary: The days leading up to Regina's wedding leave her riddled with anxiety. All of it culminates in her running off the day of.
Relationships: Evil Queen | Regina Mills & Snow White | Mary Margaret Blanchard, Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Robin Hood
Comments: 6
Kudos: 15





	Flares

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Valentine's Day to Laura (lau_p_g)! I hope you have an amazing day. :)

Aesop’s Table is busier than it has probably ever been. The Rabbit Hole was mentioned, but someone else pointed out that this place was “classier”. Only the best ale is flowing from the tap while other people have been ordering special mixed drinks. Regina herself has been nursing the same martini since the night began. Her black sequined cocktail dress itches against her skin, the only relief being below her bare knees. The diamond on her finger that once brought her such joy suddenly feels heavy.

Across the room, Regina sees her handsome fiancé. His dark blonde hair gelled back, a black “groom” sash proudly hung around his faded Rolling Stones t-shirt and dark wash jeans. He’s laughing over something Little John says. Robin catches her eye and flashes her a smile. She manages to give one back.

The music above switches and Dream On blasts through the speakers. Normally, it’s one of her favorite songs and she’d be out on the dance floor with her fiancé, smiling up at him, happily thinking of what tomorrow will hold. For some reason, she can’t find that happiness tonight.

“Regina!”

Snow’s peppy voice breaks through Aerosmith’s lyrics. Glass of craft beer in hand, she’s rushing over with an obnoxious pink “maid of honor” sash over her own dress. In the distance, Maleficent and Tink proudly wear their “bridesmaid” ones. Snow had given Regina her own white one that stated “bride” in bold, gold lettering along with a plastic tiara. Regina debated it for about two seconds before they left the mansion that night and decided to conveniently “forget” about them. Robin was happy to wear his, calling it tradition for this realm. If Snow cares Regina refused to wear it, she isn’t showing it.

“Snow!” Regina attempts to match her excitedness.

“You love this song. Let’s go dance.”

“I don’t feel like it.”

Snow tilts her head in a ridiculously adorable way. “Really?”

“Yeah, I’m not feeling that great.”

“Too much to drink?”

“Let’s go with that.”

“You should eat something.” Snow turns to the bartender behind Regina. “Can we get an order of nachos?”  
  


Normally Regina would devour them in a second. Tonight, her stomach is in absolute knots. It’s not a new thing either. Over the past few days, something else begins to tighten in her body. Everyone tells her it’s just stress. She’s getting married, it’s a big event. There’s bound to be a little anxiety.

Except, it’s Regina’s perfect day, or as perfect as it could be. Her first wedding, she had zero input. From the dress to the flowers, even the groom. This time, she and Robin have gone over everything together. She’s not wearing white, instead a gorgeous midnight blue mermaid gown that hugs her every curve and shows off just enough boob. She found heels that’ll work in the woods. Robin’s not even wearing a tux, instead just a simple white button down and some slacks. Fairy lights are being hung by decorators as everyone parties tonight, while Granny cut out a few minutes ago to double check the menu: roast chicken, corn on the cob and mashed potatoes. A five-tier red velvet cake will serve their family and friends. They’ll dance the night away under the stars, having a wedding fit for a Queen and archer combining their families.

So, why does she feel like she’s suddenly about to explode?

Regina manages to shove a few cheese covered tortilla chips down her throat and take a few more sips of her martini. David approaches her, a sleeping Roland in his arms and a dazed Henry beside him.

“I’ll take them back to the loft,” he explains. “I’ll drop him off at the mansion in the morning so they can get ready.”

Regina quickly swallows her gin and wraps her arms around her son. “I love you, be good for your grandfather.”

Henry nods, blinking a few times. “Love you, Mom.”

Regina manages to stroke Roland’s cheek before David carries him away. In just a few hours, she’s going to be his step-mother. She’s been taking care of him basically since they met, it shouldn’t be such a big deal. Except the last time Regina was a step-mother…she epically failed.

The knot in her stomach tightens.

Robin comes over next, lacing his fingers through hers. Her stomach relaxes a little but her heartbeat quickens. He is so handsome, from his beautiful blue eyes to the dimples that encroach his cheeks. There’s the way he looks at her with all the love in the world, like she deserves it. And she’s not quite sure if she does.

“It’s almost midnight,” he whispers.

Regina’s eyes flash to a wooden moose analog clock on the wall. In five minutes, it’ll officially be her wedding day. Letting out a deep breath, she looks back at him. “It is.”

“I’m spending the night at John’s. I’ll see you for first look tomorrow.”

She didn’t even know that was a thing until Snow showed her it in a wedding magazine. “I’ll be the one in…well, blue.” That manages to get a smile out of her.

Robin chuckles, caressing her cheek with his free hand. She leans into his embrace, feeling safe, loved. “You gonna be okay? You’ve been quiet all night.”

“I’m fine,” she lies. “Just pre-wedding jitters.”

“You sure about that?”

She wants to be honest. Tell him about how she’s barely been able to eat in days. That she’s barely slept a wink. She wants to tell him that she’s fucking terrified and that this whole thing feels like a massive mistake.

Instead, she just nods. “Mal, Snow and Tink are spending the night at the mansion, so I won’t be completely be alone.”

“Alright.” His lips brush against hers and she returns it, ever so briefly. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” The first truthful thing she’s said all night.

John comes over, throwing an arm around his shoulders and leading him away. Regina watches them, Robin laughing once more at something. Tears cloud her vison as she strokes the opal ring around her finger. She does love Robin, with everything in her. It’s why she can’t break his heart right now.

But come tomorrow, she won’t be at the front of the aisle.

* * *

Snow wakes up before anyone else. She knows that she’s a bit too excited for this wedding. Everyone blames it on her peppiness and tendency to take over, maybe that’s part of it. The larger part is knowing that this isn’t Regina’s second wedding. This is her first real one. Marrying her true love, someone who understands her and deeply cares for her in return…it was something Snow had disrupted decades ago. She was a child, there’s been forgiveness all around and yet, she will do everything to make sure that Regina’s wedding to Robin goes off without a hitch. It’s what she deserves after all she’s been through.

In most fairytales, the book or movie ends with the villain dead and the heroes getting married. Snow knows by now that there isn’t such a thing as a happy ending, rather a happy beginning. And Regina deserves her own. One that includes not just Robin, but a huge family that believes in her and loves her in return. Today, their family grows by Robin, Roland and the rest of the Merry Men. Snow will make sure there is not a thing wrong.

Pulling her white “Maid of Honor” robe closer to her (okay, maybe she went a bit too far with the tacky memorabilia), she grabs the breakfast catering order from Granny’s off the porch. It’s a basket filled to the brim with scones, croissants and muffins. Snow sets it up in the kitchen, mixing the mimosas next. She would’ve made the breakfast herself, but she’d rather not poison everyone.

Snow’s searching for the plates, when she stumbles across a piece of Regina’s personal stationary. Cream colored with a red “RM” surrounded by an apple embossed on the front, it’s recognizable. She picks it up, taking in Regina’s beautiful cursive.

_For Robin,_

_I’m sorry. I just can’t do this. It’s nothing you did, it’s all me. I know that sounds incredibly cliché but…God, I’m just sorry._

_Love, Regina_

Snow has read dozens of wedding magazines since Regina announced her engagement. She’s poured over Martha Stewart Weddings, Bridal Guide, Pretty Pear Bride and of course, The Knot. All of them had tips on how to be not only the perfect bride, but what your maid of honor can do to help. Snow’s followed the guidelines of letting Regina take the lead of everything, going along with it and helping her every step of the way so she didn’t have to lift a finger. She’s read blogs on how to best handle the day of. Snow is taking all questions about the ceremony from start time to dress code from all of the guests. She sent Regina’s dress to be steamed not long after she woke up. The something old (Henry Sr’s pocket watch), something new (her black stockings), something borrowed (pearl earrings from Mal) and something blue (eyeshadow) are all carefully tucked away by Snow, ready to be put on not long after the dress.

But no magazine or website told Snow what she’s supposed to do when the bride takes off.

The door to the mansion opens and shuts. Snow rushes to the entry way, hoping and praying it’s her best friend. Instead, Robin stands there, also still in pajamas. Snow fumbles and shoves the note into her pocket. She’s always been a shit liar, how is she supposed to talk her way out of this one?

“Robin!” Her voice grows higher and Snow wants to smack herself.

An easy smile falls across Robin’s face. “Hey Snow.”

“You…you can’t see Regina yet!” Snow blurts out, it’s all she can think of. “Bad luck,”

He chuckles. “I know, trust me. I just wanted to drop off something I got for her.” He holds out a package wrapped in gold. Snow slowly accepts it. “Where is she anyway?”

Snow’s stomach flips. “Um, I don’t know.”

Robin raises an eyebrow. “You don’t know?”

“Well, I’ve been busy with Maid of Honor duties. I’m…I’m sure she’s in the shower or something. But you really should go, she’ll be down any minute.”

_At least I really hope._

A flash of doubt goes across Robin’s eyes. “Snow, are you sur everything’s okay?”

“It’s fine,” Snow manages to squeak out. “You just…really need to go.” She puts her hand on his arm and manages to push him towards the door. “Seriously, we’ll see you later.” She opens the door.

“Snow…”

“Bad luck!” Snow repeats, shutting it quickly.

She leans against the door, shutting her eyes. There’s no way he’s going to buy all of that. She needs to find Regina before he does.

* * *

The office is empty as Regina goes over the new contracts for the expansion on the library. She told her staff she’d be taking the entire weekend off but now it’s a safe place to hide out.

The clocktower dings in the distance. 9 AM. She should be finishing breakfast by now and the makeup artist will be arriving to do everyone’s looks. Regina had landed on her hair curled and loose, as a contrast to her first wedding day. Everything about this second one was supposed to be flipped from her first.

Regina thought that the tightness in her stomach would go away once she decided for sure not to go through with it. Tink, Mal and Snow were fast asleep in the guest rooms while she sat on her bed, feet dangling over. She used to be so terrified to do that as a child, convinced a monster would come and drag her underneath. Regina’s all grown up now, though, and she knows real monsters exist. She’s been one of them. It’s partially why she can’t go through with it.

Yet, she feels worse. She pictures Robin finding the note and his face. That beautiful smile and those dimples disappearing from his face. If his smile lights it up, a frown darkens it. With any hope, Snow will find it first and break the news gentler than she ever could. She has the tact for this situation. She left a separate note for Snow, instructing her to look after Henry until she was ready to face him tonight. He was so excited for this wedding, for them to gain more family. She’s letting him down.

God, she’s going to be sick.

Regina reads the same sentence for the tenth time and pushes the contracts off her desk. There’s no way she’s going to get anything done.

“You know most people don’t work on their wedding day.”

Snow’s voice isn’t peppy or melodic, it’s sardonic. This isn’t the hopeful princess who asked her to braid her hair or Mary Margaret who helped her students build bird houses. This is the bandit that sliced Regina’s cheek and demanded to take her village back.

“It’s not my wedding day,” Regina replied, meeting her eye. Snow’s in a simple sweatshirt and jeans, a bottle of champagne and two plastic flutes hanging from her grasp.

“Yeah, I saw that.” She crosses over to the desk. “I found the note before Robin.”

“You were meant to.”

“Coward’s way out, don’t you think?” Snow asks, setting the glasses down. The cork comes out with a pop, causing Regina to flinch. Her friend slowly pours out the bubbly drink. “Couldn’t tell him yourself?”

“It’s better this way,” Regina says, unsure if she’s trying to convince Snow or herself.

Snow drops into the seat in front of her desk. “Is it? For who?”

“Robin. He deserves someone who isn’t a villain. Roland deserves a step-mother who wasn’t responsible for his mother’s death.”

“Okay, let’s say I buy that. You’re not a villain anymore, Regina. You’ve done so much good. You saved Robin and Roland’s life more than once. And not just them, you’ve been a hero to everyone. When Emma was the Dark One, you were the savior.” Snow passes her a glass. “And I’m sure in time, you and Roland will have to deal with what happened to Marian. But you can and will get past it. You managed to get past all your issues with Henry.”

“That’s…different.”

“How? It’s not going to be easy, but Roland will forgive you. And unlike with Henry, you’re not going to be alone when this happens. You’ll have me, David, Mal…and Robin.”

Regina bites her lip, taking a long sip of her champagne.

“And I know that’s not the real reason,” Snow continues. “If it were, you’d just talk to Robin about it. So, spill.”

“I don’t have time for this.”

“What, you have a meeting?” Snow challenges. “Because I know the whole town is getting ready for your wedding.”

Regina narrows her eyes. “Remember, I can blast you out of here with a fireball.”

“But you won’t.” Snow nonchalantly takes a sip of her own champagne. “So, you might as well tell me what’s going on.”

Regina lets out a groan of frustration. She hates how much Snow knows her. A part of her wants to go back to when she was a naïve little girl who didn’t realize how unhappy Regina was. But was that really true? Snow always did what she could to make Regina happy and it was just never enough.

She hates being vulnerable, letting those parts of her show. Only a few people have ever seen it: her parents, Henry, Mal, Robin…and Snow.

Regina gulps back another sip, finishing the glass. Snow pours her another one and Regina stares at the golden liquid.

“My first marriage…it was a disaster.”

Snow’s voice softens. “Regina, that’s not what this one will be like.”

Regina looks back up at her. The fierce bandit is gone, the forgiving princess has returned. “I know,” she whispers. “Robin isn’t Leopold. He loves me, I want to marry him and he wants to marry me.”

“Then why are we here?”

“Because I’m scared!” Regina exclaims. Tears prick her eyes for the millionth time that morning. “Before I met Robin, marriage always reminded me of one of the darkest periods of my life. Being left alone until he… _needed_ me…”

Snow flinches, but gestures for her to continue. They’ve dealt with the harsh realities of her marriage to the King before. Snow has made it clear to never hold back, it’s not healthy for either of them to heal.

“I was so excited for this wedding when we started planning but the closer it got…the more scared I got. I know Robin will never be the King, but I can’t shake this feeling in me.” She takes a deep breath. “That this marriage will make us the worst versions of ourselves.”

Snow nods. “Have you spoken with him about this?”

Regina shakes her head. “I don’t think I really realized what was bothering me until last night.”

“Look, Regina,” Snow sets her glass down. “You don’t have to marry Robin. You two can stay in a committed relationship or you can even choose not to be with him. But he deserves to hear all of this, to hear the why.”

“He’s going to think it’s crazy or be hurt that I compared him to…”

“Relationship is communication. When I was engaged to David, I was terrified about having kids. Given my history with women figures, I wasn’t sure I could be a good mom. I never told him; it was incredibly lonely. But I know if I had told him, he would’ve been there. He would’ve soothed my fears. I just never gave him that chance.” Regina sighs and Snow continues. “Robin deserves a chance to do the same for you. He’s the only one that can help you with this.”

Regina picks up her glass again, taking a long sip.

“If you still don’t want to get married after that, then that’s okay,” Snow tells her.

“Really? You won’t be mad all the planning went to waste?”

“Regina, I did all of this to make you happy. That’s all I want for you, to have the life you deserve.”

A small smile peaks across Regina’s face. “Thank you, Snow,” she whispers.

“It’s what I’m here for.”

She gets up and starts to leave, then grabs something from her sweatshirt pocket.

“I almost forgot, Robin dropped this off,” Snow places it next to the champagne.

Once she leaves, Regina carefully removes the note attached to it.

_Darling,_

_In just a few hours, we’re going to finally say “I do”. After parallel universes, portals and several realms, I cannot wait to spend forever with you. We’re not just combining two families, but two worlds. Here is something to represent that merge. Here’s to our next great adventure._

_All the love, Robin_

She lifts the lid and lifts out a necklace. A silver chain holds a gorgeous charm. An arrow collides through an apple. Regina gently pulls it around her neck and holds the charm close to her heart.

* * *

Regina makes her way through John’s house to his bedroom where she knows Robin is getting ready. Will was hesitant to let her in, but a quick glare moved him out of the doorway. She peaks her head into the bedroom where Robin is buttoning the last few of his crisp white shirt. He looks incredibly handsome, with a smile on his face as he gazes into the mirror. Those dimples make her knees go weak. He looks up and spots her, quickly covering his eyes.

“Regina! I thought we weren’t supposed to see each other before we were dressed.”

“Stupid tradition.” Regina takes a step into the bedroom and closes the door behind her. “You look handsome.”

He drops his calloused hand and takes in her gray t-shirt, black vest and slacks. “I don’t care what you wear, but that’s a bit casual, even for us, no?” Regina is silent and he takes a step forward. “Are you alright?”

“No,” she admits and for the first time all week, she feels a little better. “I’m not. I was so excited for this wedding and then the closer it got…” She sees fear fill his eyes and she grabs hold of his hand. “I want to marry you, I do. I love you and the boys so much, I don’t know what to do with myself.”

He nods, but still looks a little unconvinced. “But?”

“This isn’t my first marriage.”

“I know, it’s neither of ours,” he points out.

“Yes, but Marian, she wasn’t…”

She trails off and he stares at her for a moment, before recognition fills her eyes. He drops her hand and caresses her cheek.

“Regina, I am not Leopold.”

“I know that,” she whispers. “Rationally, I know that you’re not gong to hurt me. That we’re going to be extremely happy together. But my brain…”

“Our minds are hardly rational,” he amends. “Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

“Because it sounds ridiculous and I didn’t want to hurt you by saying this out loud. I know you’re not my first husband. This wedding is my choice, you’re the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. But the huge ceremony, the pomp and circumstance…it just brings me back. And I’m terrified that once we slide those rings on each other’s fingers…we’re going to change.”

“Change?”

“My first marriage turned me into the worst version of myself. It wasn’t just him. I know that it was several smaller things all at once.” She swallows back thoughts of Rumpelstiltskin, her mother and Jefferson. “I just don’t want to go back to that, being miserable. Because these past few years, with you, our boys, the family we’ve created…I don’t want to mess this up.”

Robin leads her over to the bed and they collapse onto it. He pulls her into his grasp and she relaxes against his shirt, listening to the sound of his heartbeat. Robin runs his fingers through her hair, relaxing on the chain around her neck.

“I meant what I said in my note, Regina,” he whispers. “This marriage, is our next great adventure. It’s a symbol of our families becoming one. But it doesn’t have to happen. We don’t need to get married for us to be together. We can have everything that’s apart of marriage without the actual piece of paper. We’ll always be together.”

“But it’s the natural next step,” Regina mutters.

“For some people. That doesn’t mean it has to be for us. Our families will still be one. We’re still going to live together. And I know I’m not going anywhere.” He cuddles her closer. “Regina, if this marriage is triggering for you, we won’t do it. This can just be a big party for our friends and family.”

Regina lets out a deep breath. She stares down at the ring that covers the fourth finger on her left hand. Before it felt like a weight dragging her into the ocean and drowning her. Now, it’s lighter, feeling how it did when he put it on her. She slowly pulls away and rises to her feet.

“I promise to love you, to stand by your side and go camping at least once a year.”

Robin laughs, standing up. His shirt is wrinkled now and his hair, mussed. “What is this?”

“Wedding vows.”

“Tuck’s not here.”

“So? Like you said, we don’t need it to be official.”

He smiles and takes a step forward, removing the rings from his pocket. “Glad I didn’t give these to Henry yet.” He hands her the one meant for him and she slides it over his finger.

“And you?” She asks.

He lets out a deep breath. “I promise to love, honor and cherish you through everything. To never turn my back on you. And I promise to not mock your shoe collection too often.”

Regina lets out a loud, rippling laugh for the first time in a long time. His grin widens as he pushes her own band in front of her engagement ring. She looks up at him and tilts her head.

  
“Gonna kiss your bride?”

He cups her cheek and gently kisses her. In a few years, after therapy and time, they’ll get another marriage license that they’ll actually sign. That night, they dance the night away with their friends and family, based on a few simple promises exchanged in John’s bedroom.


End file.
